Poets Wanted!

Adrian – We need an original angle.

Bernard – No, we just need members.

Adrian – And to get members we need to be the standout poetry group in the town. And to be the standout poetry group, we need an angle. Or a slogan.

Bernard – You mean like ‘Poetry For All’.

Adrian – PFA is the Professional Footballers’ Association. Another?

Bernard – Poets Of Wibbleton?

Adrian – Prisoners of war.

Bernard – You’re being very negative. Okay, let’s forget the slogan for now. What about a gimmick.

Adrian – I don’t think we’ll attract the calibre of poets we desire with a gimmick.

Bernard – A free gift then. New members receive a pen. Or a notebook. Or a pen and a notebook. Everybody loves a notebook and you can never have too many pens.

Adrian – Now you’re thinking along the right lines.

Bernard – You could give every member a copy of your book.

Adrian – It’s called Poetry To Die For. I don’t think it will attract lively members.

Bernard – Well republish it with a new title, like Poetry To Live For.

Adrian – I would rather they bought a copy. They did cost me £11.99 each. I don’t want to just give them away. I could knock £1 off for every member.

Bernard – But we still need to attract members to the group in the first place.

Adrian – What about blitzing the town with posters.

Bernard – Done that already.

Adrian – Local radio?

Bernard – Done it.

Adrian – Press release?

Bernard – Done that too.

Adrian – And how many application have we had?

Bernard – One.

Adrian – One?

Bernard – Well there were two, but one was from me, so I don’t think that counts.

Adrian – And the other one?

Bernard – Your wife.

Adrian – She’s the last person I want in the group!

Bernard – Well I guess that’s it then. We give up.

Adrian – I didn’t get where I am today by giving up.

Bernard – Or we think of a different angle.

Adrian – Such as?

Bernard – I do like growing petunias. Let’s start a petunia growers’ group. We could call ourselves Petunias For All… or… Petunias Of Wibbleton.

Tags: Duologue

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